Simple Division
When the Earl of Bradford was
brought before the Lord Chancellor, to be examined upon application for a
statue of Lunacy against him, the chancellor asked him, "How many
legs has a sheep?" "Does your lordship mean," answered Lord
Bradford, "a live sheep or a dead sheep?" "Is it not the
same thing?" said the chancellor. "No, my lord," said Lord
Bradford, "there is much difference; a live sheep may have four legs;
a dead sheep has only two: the fore legs are shoulders; but there are but
two legs of mutton."
Take The Test!
Joe wanted to be an accountant, so
he went for an aptitude test.
Tester: If I give you two sheep, two
sheep, and another two sheep, how many sheep have you got?
Joe: Seven!
Tester : No, listen carefully again.
If I give you two sheep, two sheep, and another two sheep, how many sheep
have you got?
Joe: Seven!
Tester : Let's try this another way.
If I give you two bottles of beer, two bottles of beer, and another
two bottles of beer, how many bottles of beer have you got?
Joe: Six.
Tester : Good! Now, if I give you
two sheep, two sheep, and another two sheep, how many sheep have you got?
Joe: Seven!
Tester : How on earth do you work
out that three lots of two sheep is seven?
Joe: I've already got one sheep at
home!
Sheep song
This song was posted in the old
sheepnet guestbook by Rikki Turner:
(To be sung to the tune of Jingle
Bells)
Sheep are very sweet, They go baaaaa and bleat,
They're as white as a sheet, Sheep are very sweet!
They live in the fields, Have their daytime meals,
I knew one once called Neil, And he lived in the fields!
Chorus
Sheep are woolly, Sheep are fooly, Sheep are very dumb.
They don't know a thing at all, And they don't learn from their mum.
Baaaaaaah!
(Repeat Chorus)